I almost gave up

I'm opening up shop. A little storefront space became available and I decided to rent it, like a crazy person with no real plan. I moved my metals bench into the space. I parked my sewing machine in need of a tune up on the desk, and started bringing in old dusty metal shelving my mom has been collecting. She collects all sorts of interesting things and for years we have talked about opening a shop. She has an endless flow of ideas to artfully transform old junk into new things to use or display.

I figured, if we are going to do it ever we better start now.

I am here at home now, while my 4 year old spends his afternoon at pre-k and my 21 month old daughter naps, thankfully. This is my time alone during the day. Two hours.

I probably should be making another scarf.

I have made one so far.

Of all my mom's and my material interests, we share several. As a teen she used to sew A LOT. She made most of her own clothes and quite a bit for others too. When she was out of school she worked for Wolfsie's, a fabric store in Galesburg and she made some trips to New York's garment district to select new fabrics. She still has a lot of fabric and it is hard for either of us to get rid of materials we can easily envision repurposed as something new.

I have an appreciation for fabrics too. When I shop at thrift stores I scan the racks for the higher quality materials and rich colors, something with a nice feel in my hand. I am drawn to soft but sturdy cottons and linen, wool, silk. Polyester is out of my comfort zone, but I'll go there. I don't sew a lot, but I love fabric.

For the new shop, I primarily wanted to focus on making jewelry and things out of metal as that has been my direction in recent years. But, I want to have a varied inventory of handmade adornments for the body and home to sell along with the awesome vintage things my mom has an eye for. I also want/need to make use of materials I already have.

I am both a lazy and impulsive seamstress. I haven't used a pattern in years. I think of an idea and I just try to make it. Sometimes I can pull off an idea and it turns out pretty decent, and sometime I fail and I hate it. I am terrible at sewing stuffed animals. I once tried to make a bird and it looked like a seal. And the lavender scented octopus pillow for putting on your head? Well, I'm not going to make any more of those. I don't really ever want to try making any more animals.

Scarves seem doable. They are versatile and for me, serve as a small canvas for playing with materials and color. I am excited about the idea of having a bunch of thoughtfully designed textiles on display which people may be inspired to buy and wear themselves or gift to others.

Wearable art. That's what I want to make and sell in my shop. I want to make it right there. (And at home while my children are sleeping.)

Anyway, I titled this blog "One Thousand Scarves" because I want to make a lot of scarves and work through this idea I have. I don't know if I'll make that many but onehundredscarves was already taken. I titled this post, "I almost gave up," because after spending hours trying to make one scarf, I had my doubts that I can do this. I wasn't happy with how the first one was coming together. It was taking me too long and my original vision wasn't coming through. I'm never going to he able to make any money at this. Do I even want to do this? Why am I doing this? I don't even know how to sew very well.
Etc.

I thought of that hateful little bird/seal failure and recognized I needed to get a grip and stop hassling myself.

I stepped back, opened a beer, and stared at what I had done and the large pile of fabrics I rounded up for this purpose. I looked at the materials and ideas I had played with in that first attempt and asked myself, how can I make a bunch of scarves like the ones I envisioned, more easily? I realized I need a larger simple "canvas" to start so I don't have to spend so much energy just constucting the scarf from small pieces of material. I thought to myself, this is going to take some work, and some time, but I can do it.